Go to any comic or game store and look to the left of you and then to the right of you; chances are the fellow geeks next to you are swag zombies. I know I am but I have taken max ranks in appraise and have developed a more discriminating taste in my swag. What is a swag zombie you ask?
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| Don't move, they detect motion. |
Swag Zombies are the (usually) unwashed throngs of attendees at pop culture or industry events that will beg, borrow or steal to get whatever free knick knack companies are flinging out of their booths; hopefully by scantily clad booth babes.
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Middle guy thinks he's too cool to beg.
He's wrong |
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I heard more than one fellow attendee deriding the swag zombies yelling for a free Zelda whistle or Pokemon oven mitt or whatever whilst showing off their Duke Nuke Shirt they got by being one of the first to see the new trailer. You see, they earned it by sitting through viewing the hard labor or talented people rather then yelling their heads off like an enthusiastic fan of their hobby.
While I fully support the geek inclination to acquire little bits and pieces of the things that are important to us I also want to remind you all to be safe and courteous.
Remember, the little kid you trample to get the Voltron foil cover card today could have been the kid that would have made Final Fantasy 32 super awesome.
In closing I call out to all swag zombies to unite and not take abuse from the snobs that we all know secretly want the Samus Salt Shaker. If they don't adjust their attitude we will have but one choice:
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| BRAAAAAIIINNSSSS........... |
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