PAX Quick Hit: Food Fail 2: The French Toast is a Lie!

I'm gonna say it, I love breakfast, specifically the carbtastic additions like pancakes, waffles and french toast. My cinnamon sugar french toast and brown sugar waffles have made grown men weep and stopped at least 2 wars. You can't imagine how happy I was on my return leg in the Seattle airport, after struggling through security and losing my commemorative, vibrating grenade stress toy, to see on the menu at the cafe by my gate one of my favorite preflight meals: french toast!

I was lured in with promises of sweet maple syrup, light, soft bread dipped lovingly in farm fresh eggs. With visions of deliciousness dancing in my head I happily ordered such fare from my overly perky waitress and waited. There I sat licking my chops and enjoying the anticipation of the moment.

Before I knew it they arrived and  my heart sank like the Niners playoff hopes.

Abomination!

WHEAT BREAD FRENCH TOAST!
I didn't pay $11 for breakfast to get a ghetto last resort meal! Wheat bread is used in french toast only under duress or if you're trying to be a pretentious prick. I think we know which option this cafe was going for.

I don't really have a problem with this cafe trying to dress up their french toast with some hippie wheat bread with more nuts in it than a Haight Ashbury bath house but give a brother some warning. If they said on the menu that it was wheat bread than I'd have passed it over in favor of the breakfast buritto and you all could have enjoyed a rant on how the tortillas you get at restaurants are an affront to humanity and we should all storm every cafe that serves these anemic flour papers with pitch forks and torches. <----longest sentence ever.

I did however enjoy the orange.